Why Doesn’t She Just Leave? : Understanding Why Women Stay in Abusive Relationships

why doesnt she just leave understanding why women stay in abusive relationships

This book reveals the myriad of reasons why victims of domestic violence stay in abusive relationships. The reasons are as endless as the number of domestic violence victims. Each story is unique and each reason is valid. The author Dr. Oluchi Arowosafe strongly opined that blaming the victim is the wrong approach, stating that no matter how common the belief is, maintaining that no one deserves to be or enjoys being abused and that leaving a violent relationship is most often the most dangerous time for the victim. She maintains that by repeatedly asking this same question (Why doesn’t she just leave?), the society continues to re-victimize the victim by pinning the responsibility squarely on her. The author opines that that the blame should be shifted to the perpetrator. The author equally indicates that by asking this question the society makes the problem to be the victim’s and the solution to be her responsibility, totally absolving the criminal justice system and the social institutions their responsibilities of protecting victims of domestic violence. She opined that for victims to safely leave abusive situations, the society at large must cooperatively work to protect them and equally hold these perpetrators of violence accountable.

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